Being crazy? Or just afraid of my shadow?

Sometimes it feels like someone is watching me. It seams like he is trying to find something bad about me that could help him to present wrong things about me. To present fake things about me. Sometimes I feel like noone wants me to achieve big goals!

Am I stupid? Or is it something that keeps me being afraid of bad coincidencies? Or is it that I am afraid of my shadow?

What makes me feel like this? What is this feeling I have, like something or someone hunts me? And how can I make it go away from me?

I realy don’t know! The only thing that I know is this feeling.. It is what I feel… It is that nobody can calm me down when this bad feeling comes up to bother me!

And I need to fight it. I need to win! And one day, I’ll do it… And I’ll be the winner! One day… One day.

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It’s About Me!

There is nothing more difficult than to talk about yourself… So I decided to do it! Because I love to do difficult things even if I know I may not be able to do it! 

But, for a start, let me introduce myself.

I am Dimitra. I am Greek and I am 19 years old. I’ll give you some things about me that might help you meet me.

I like a lot of colors, like black, blue, B&W. My favorite color is purple. I really love this color! I have purple nail polish, purple bracelets, decorations… I have a little, lovely purple whiskey. I have a lot of purple things. And whenever I see purple things I just enthuse! 

I love pigtails. I love making my hair a lot of these and make them seam like hair rashes! Nevertheless I have never gone to the salon to make it that way. I like the procedure of making them by myself!

I love writing, but I have read little books and novels. I know it is not so normal… But this is the truth! Oh… and I don’t want to forget telling you that I love to be sincere and so I almost require from people to be honest with me! I do not know, of course, whether this is a good or a bad thing.

Anyway.

Let’s talk deeper for me.

I am a person like an open book. The most of what you can see, it’s what you see. It is sure that there are sides of me that nobody can know, except me and whoever I let know…  But the most are so easy to see them.

The posts I write here, in the blog, are the most of them about thoughts, inspirations of the moment, or just feelings there are inside me. Some other posts just describe how I see life in a different side. 

The Novels I write are the most of them dramas or psychological thrilers. I write social and fantastic Novels, but I am not so efficient to these. I write them in Greek, but I want to translate some of them in English, or just write in English. I haven’t dare to do this yet.

When I write I feel like I am inside an other world… The world of words, as I have written to one of my posts «The World of Words». The most of my Novels I have written them on the first face, so that I can describe easier the feelings and the thoughts of the protagonist! I think it’s easiest for the readers to be inside the case of each Novel. 

Sometimes they ask me «Have you been in this role? Are you in this story?». It’s because of writing on the first face. I get lost in the story I am writing, and at some point I may even imprint truths, either mine or my surroundings! 

Maybe you’re wondering why I’m telling you all this. Well, I believe that it needs for you to know some things about me, so you can understant better the way I am thinking of, when I write every post that I public here! I hope I didn’t get you tired. I always forget to stop talking – writing… And don’t forget that it’s important for me, to know that you like my posts. It’s even more important to know when you don’t like them ’cause this can make me better!

Thank you for reading about me!

Don’t Let Me Fall.

There are times that I can’t control myself and I just feel like I am going straight to a precipice. It seams like nothing and nobody is able to help me stop! This happens when something changes in my life and, this change, it isn’t for good. And it also happens when somebody that I love leaves from my life. It happens when I let myself breaks the limits of my circle of freedom and can’t find other limit, so can’t stop running away from the circle.

There is nothing worst, only this feeling, that you are not able to stop yourself of running straight to the precipice! And you believe that you can’t stop, because you were been for a long time strong… You were fighting for a long time with yourself to do the right thing, the right moment. And sometime you felt you can’t do this all the time. You can’t do this… No more! You realise you are tired of trying to stay in the circle of right and normal people. And you let yourself go away from the circle. And he suddenly starts running.

He started running…

And he didn’t knew where to go, he just wanted to relax from all these «right» things he was doing. He just wanted to feel more free.

And sometime, you just lost him, you lost yourself, because you haven’t let him feel so free ever again and now he doesn’t know how to act and how to manage this freedom! He is not able to control his mind. And he comes to be crazy. And he suddenly closes up to the precipice… and he is one breath to fall.

This is the time that I need someone or something to help me. Something to believe, or someone to believe! I need to change direction. But if I am not able of changing the way I see the world, how can I change my direction? 

Some people just can’t come back. Some other people need to stop running at the edge of the precipice and then, come back.

And me? Sometimes I just stop running and start to come back…

But some other times I need only one person to help! And this is you! You are the only one who can bring me back. And if you won’t anticipate to stop me running… What will happen then??

I don’t know! So just don’t let me fall. Don’t let me run far away from the circle, even if I need to feel free…

Help me lay limits on the size of my freedom, so that I won’t feel out of my reach. And when I become accustomed to this size of freedom, let me have more freedom. And be with me!

I hope you like my post. I chose to write like I am talking about myself, because I believe it’s easier to get you in the spirit of the text. 

My responce to The Daily Post

The Qualm.

People want to have a normal life. A life that ofers to them the peace they need. People need to feel they have some granted things in their life.

But it is in the nature of life to change the granted things. And there is nothing more frequent than to meet a new «problem» or a new person, that will disturb the routine! And then, people realise they have a qualm. Or a lot of quarms! «Shall I talk to her?» … «What can I do?» And sometimes people just hide their feelings and their thoughts, because they get afraid of their qualms. They can’t control what is going to happen if they choose the wrong way, the wrong person, the wrong place… They get afraid of taking the risk to choose and so they stay in a situation that they can’t manage! And they can’t manage this, because they need to choose!

My responce to The Daily Post

Me, myself and I.

There are so many memories I can remember. From when I was so little girl and I had bad ideas of destroying the house with my twin sister’s help, until now… Now, that I make collaborations to bigger and better ideas. I remember when I was in the last class of the Vocational Senior High School and I was in the theatre team, as was my twin sister, and we had the best of our collaborations! It was something like having a good time and working hard at the same moment. It was so difficalt to work all the people together. Sometimes, working alone is much more easier! But it is an experience that nobody of us will ever forget! We managed to have a great result. The performance was so good. We couldn’t realise we would manage it! Not because we couldn’t do it, but because  sometimes it was so difficalt to work as a team that, one week before the performance we almost gave up!

But we did it! And it was so beautiful experience!

My responce to The Daily Post

Hospitality in Greece.

Greece. Such a small country with such great things to offer. Sun, sand, sea, mountains and trees! 

Except for all this, there is something that I don’t know if I could find it anywhere else. This, is what we call hospitality. It is when you go for a walk and the people ask you to come and have a glass of wine with them. It is when they invite you to have a good time together, even if it is the first time they met you!

Have you ever make a Greek friend and decide to meet him, in his country?? If you have, I am almost sure he has suggested to host you at his home! Not because you have no money, nor because there is no hotel at your fingertips. It’s just in the blood of the Greeks!

My responce to The Daily Post

The Final Moment.

We all fight for something. We fight for our wantings, we fight for our beliefs… We fight for geting money. We fight for waking one more day. We all fight for something!

Some people fight for what we think it is given. They try to walk, they try to speak, they try to eat, they try for having a normal life, whatever that means!

We never know when it will be our last breath. We can’t predict when it will be our final moment. And we just must stop acting like life never ends.

We need to live every day like it is the final day of our lives. Because there is no other way to live our lives to the fullest!

Have you ever stop thinking and just feel and enjoy your moment? Have you?

My responce to The Daily Post